That's crazy to me. Tuesday is my best friend's birthday.
Lots of things to say. Friday night was the We The Kings show in Lawrence, and it was so much fun. Road trip'd it with one of my bffs, scarfed some Chipotle, and waited in line for 45 minutes in below zero temps. I had to run across the street at one point to pee, and I was so desperate it was the men's bathroom for me. Agh. Worth it. The show was great, The Cab and WTK were just awesome, I remember seeing WTK as this small band on Warped and now they're headlining. The Cab will be doing the same this summer, from what I've heard. So cool. I got chills during This Is Our Town. Hannah and I were getting crazy, scoping out all the hotties and making fun of people. I love it. Towards the end no one was really dancing or getting crazy, which is totally unacceptable to me. I came there to dance, fuckers. So I grabbed Hannah's arm and rushed forward and started moshing like fuck. Everyone got so mad; I heard so many girls that night say it was their first show. And I don't judge that really, but god...just get into it. Go with the flow. Let go and have FUN. I love moshing. I'd never started my own mosh before, and it was so great. I loved it. I was so proud, ha. I have tons of photos to upload, they're alright but not great. I'd gotten out of the groove of the whole "concert photography" shit. We met Marshall after the show, really nice dude. He signed my ticket but I lost it...pretty sure it's somewhere in a gas station parking lot in Lawrence, Kansas. Sad.
So yesterday I wake up all "unghhh" in typical post-show fashion, and head to my not-so-thoughtfully-scheduled facial. All is fine, whatever. I get home and BAM: chills, aches, pains, the whole thing. I think, okay, this is not normal. Of course I go to my mommy. Decided it was the collective badness of standing in fucking freezing weather, moshing and going nuts like I haven't done in kind of a while, and touching all these people who might have been sickly lately. I don't know, but shit hit me so fast and so hard. I was in bed all day yesterday crying (no joke, and I hate crying). Today I woke up feeling a bit better but damn, this sucks. Damn you flu, damn you. I'm just now getting to a point where I can listen to music again without wanting to rip my ears off.
Other than that I'm in a good emotional mood today. There's this part in Girl, Interrupted when Winona Ryder's character says, "When you don't want to feel, death can seem like a dream. But seeing death, really seeing it, makes dreaming about it fucking ridiculous." I'm not talking about death, but it applies. Thinking so much about something and fantasizing so much is pointless, because when you're actually doing it or witnessing it, it's so different. What's in your head is nothing. The more shows I go to, the less of a big deal they are. I go to have fun. They're not earth shaking, but they do mean a lot to me. Closer and closer to finding my balance.
I'm very ready for summer. I can't wait to dye my hair and get my nose pierced again. I'm really sick of the snow but guess what happened yesterday? It snowed. I want some tea...and more sleep. My scope for this week from Mystic Medusa is as follows: "The sensation of domestic urgency re living arrangements et al subsides and/or climaxes in early March, leaving you with a year of blessings chez Scorp. But the current high alert comes courtesy of Mars – your ruling planet once upon a time – so give all home irks/concerns your total attention. The New Moon on Weds is a classic opportunity for a Scorpionic Phoenixing jag. Pull off a ruthless uncluttering/oh-my-goddinginsight jag before mid-week. Then launch another neo-You." and I'm feeling it. I've been meaning to do an overhaul on my shit for so long, this room is too much. I need to clean it up and get myself together. I have those Scorpionic Phoenixing jags all the time so I'm not surprised, but I rarely do anything about them, I don't take action. I just need to do what I need to do and get healthy and get through this school year. There is so much to do all the time.
This post has taken me two hours off and on to write, so I have to stop.
