I'm in the position of knowing or not knowing that I care about what's going on in my life at the moment. so many things/events/drama has happened that I'm thinking I've slipped into my habit of totally withdrawing myself from the world. in the heat of the moment, I feel emotion so strongly it makes me shake, but after thinking and looking at the big picture, I realize that I just don't care anymore. I have phases like this, usually around autumn/winter. Things happen that I can't control. I question everything and everyone around me. It seems I don't have the ability to suck it up and carry on. I don't have a tough skin, nor do I think I'm cut out for life and all it's uneccessary rules and petty jobs. After being forced to take a look at myself, I see that I really don't care.
Is this giving up? am i just chucking in the towel on having a good, strong life with loyal frineds? Have I kept my head in the clouds for so long reality has become only one huge disappointment?
On a lighter note, the new movie Across the Universe looks to be a fantastic film. Sure to be a new favorite of mine. It comes out firday night, and I'm so excited it's a little scary. The soundtrack is AMAZING! lovelovelove. i might go out and see it with Maddy, I think after this week we're going to need some time together to chill.
Seriously, hit up the movie theater Friday night. See you there!
